So many things have happened in the past 24 hours that have messed with my emotions. Some of the things are things I shouldn't let bother me. I just need to talk these things out, even if no one reads them...here goes.
1) Last night I found out that yet two MORE people I know are pregnant, in addition to the other billion (it seems) people I already knew who are expecting. I know I only have to wait until late March until I can have my shot at a pregnancy...partly for a medical reason and the timing would be good because Jay gets back from tech school in late March. If I got pregnant now, he would be gone when I'd have a baby. I am soo happy for all my friends who are pregnant, it's just hard for me to know that I have to wait a little longer. It's like if I hadn't gone to college, I wouldn't have any debt, and I could have a baby any time I felt like it and not have to worry about too many bills, like my college loan. At the same time though, I wouldn't have done it any other way. I love my job, which I wouldn't have had I not gone to college, and I wouldn't have the lifestyle I have today.
2) Our friend leaves for Iraq this week. He told me in detail about things that are currently going on in Iraq and Afghanistan. After saying goodbye to him, and remembering that other friends of ours are over there, I was left with a feeling of dismay. It scares me, but I know it's necessary, and I know they signed up for it. I just hope my husband won't have to go again. I know it's probably not going to happen that way, but there's not harm in wishing away the inevitable...
3) Today at work I had a great day, for the most part. Then the end came. I was informed by my boss that instead of assisting chairside with my normal Dr, I would now be assisting him. Whose great idea was this? OK, ok. I know it's also a necessary thing, I'm just a little defiant when it comes to change I guess. Maybe a lot more defiant than I remember... After giving it some thought, and with some encouragement from a few awesome coworkers, I decided that although it will be challenging it doesn't mean I shouldn't try. It just means I should try...harder.
4) Still no news....but that's to be expected as far as PCSing goes. I've come a long way from 'not wanting to ever leave my home' to where I am now which is totally willing to move anywhere to be with my love. I didn't say it would be easy. I'm just the kind of person that likes to have a plan. I'd like to know where we are going before we start packing. I know we are 'scheduled' to find out most likely between October and January. We will be moving around next summer. I guess that's enough of a heads up. I just go back and forth with whether or not I think I can handle a move, emotionally. I think I'll be fine though. I'll just have to find a lot of things to do and see that will keep my mind busy so I won't think about home.
5) I got back in touch with an old friend yesterday. Our friendship ended a little rocky, thanks to...both of us I think. I'm just blessed to have her back in my life!!
The end! I feel better already.
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